From Idea to Canvas

Often I have artistic ideas and I try to put them on paper. A lot of what I do is abstract, but sometimes my ideas form into imaginable images. Most of these ideas fall flat, but some of them grow strong. For the ones that grow, I make a lot of sketches to try and find the right perspective and angles. I’ll work for a few hours on the idea then put it aside for days or weeks, not intentionally, that just how it goes for me. Part of it is laziness, I know, but sometimes I just need a more clear image before I commit.

I had the strange experience, many years ago, that I was floating in a glass box in outer space. The thought and feeling “may have been hallucination, but I felt it was real” (Halls of Karma, Black Oak Arkansas.) The glass represented how fragile our ideas and perceptions are. The idea changed over time, but I eventually made a version of what I was thinking about.

The glass box existed, not on its own, but in a larger room. The larger, crumbling room represents the mind and the slowly breaking glass box is the ego. The mind has a manic eye that peers in from the outside through a picture frame on the wall. The ego has its own eye as well. The outside world of time, emotions and death flood in from the other picture in the mind.

As bleak and destructive looking as such an image can be, I don’t think of it in a negative way. The mind has to filter a lot so it creates defenses for itself. Over time these defenses can end up hurting us. It’s important to break down illusions and try to unclog the mind from all the walls and barriers it has put up thus preventing it from seeing its pure infinite nature.

the room oct 24
 Colored pencil and crayon on copy paper RH, 2015

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